"Your mamma's so dumb she can program in Arduino!"

Interesting and slightly amusing letter from IEEE Spectrum Editor-in-Chief Susan Hassler:

Dear Members and Readers,

Please accept our sincere apologies for the headline in today's Tech Alert: "With the Arduino, Now Even Your Mom Can Program." The actual title of the article is "The Making of Arduino."

I'm an IEEE member, and a mom, and the headline was inexcusable, a lazy, sexist cliché that should have never seen the light of day. Today we are instituting an additional headline review process that will apply to all future Tech Alerts so that such insipid and offensive headlines never find their way into your in-box.

Spectrum's insistence on editorial excellence applies to all its products, including e-mail alerts. Thank you for bringing this error to our attention. If you have any additional comments or recommendations, do not hesitate to contact me or other members of the editorial staff.

Sincerely yours,

Susan Hassler
Editor in Chief
IEEE Spectrum

[ the article that caused the fuss: http://spectrum.ieee.org/geek-life/hands-on/the-making-of-arduino ]

When the deli says "surprise" on the menu, they mean it

Now that's one helpful nutrition label...

Is an SPSS monster like a SAS bunny rabbit?

A friend of mine had a Google Talk status of "Now I'm the SPSS monster" today. Lately, I have picked up the contagious habit of making fun of people who use gooey (GUI) SPSS, and so I responded by e-mail, "Is an SPSS monster like a SAS bunny rabbit?" She responded, "Could be. Or an R-invader." I couldn't resist letting this snowball turn into the avalanche it really could be, and so...

Kick S. Way to JMP on that one and even Z-score. Such a rejoinder makes me want to click away to one of the Minitabs of my browser. Phew, all of this stat talk makes me want to regress back into MATLAB; even if I am still centrally limited there, at least I can feel normal again.

Anyway, I wasn't trying to be mean. If I was, I hope you won't log this transformation and hold it against me later. I'm certain I can transcend and function better in the future; a higher power law need not intervene. Hopefully this hypothesis is correct and you will see some significant change. That should help you restore your confidence.

On a different note, I saw some Monte Carlo tulips at the zoo last weekend; it seems risky to have planted those at this time of the season, but hopefully they will Excel. If they do die, I'm afraid this story will have a heavy tail indeed.

By the way, yesterday for graduate appreciation day, Jessie got a coupon for $1 coffee at the expensive campus Starbucks. With the discount, prices are about normal. I guess there is no such thing as a scale free lunch. Shoot, I'm afraid my coffee has gone cold and is starting to taste a little bit like Poisson.

Well, enough of this. I'm sure if you remove the outlier that is e-mail thread, you'll find that the remaining e-mails are far less skewed and better fit the distribution you have come to expect.

I hope all of your days are better than average! --
Ted

There are parts of that that I'm not that excited about, but overall I'm pretty proud of myself.

"Administrative e-mail" from Ticketmaster

By the CAN-SPAM Act of George W. Bush, Conrad Burns, and Ron Wyden, SPAM can be sent to your e-mail address as long as it provides a way to opt-out of it at the bottom of the e-mail.

Today I received this message from Ticketmaster about an upcoming Bluejackets promotion (which I took a screenshot of for you to capture the full effect – click on the image for a larger version):

OF COURSE, to be in compliance with CAN-SPAM, they need this little blurb at the bottom:

That's strange that it says "This is an administrative mail." Moreover, it's very strange that when I click on the "Link t- e-mail preferences page" link, I get a web page with a little blurb saying:

The e-mail you are coming from is administrative so you cannot unsubscribe. You may update your account preferences for non-administrative e-mails below.

Underneath the blurb, it shows that I have previously unselected all Ticketmaster spam sources. So evidently advertisements about upcoming Coors' sponsored events are purely administrative.

I should note that I haven't purchased a ticket from Ticketmaster since the summer, and I haven't purchased a BlueJackets ticket in years. There's no way this e-mail is in response to any action I have taken at Ticketmaster.

Thank you, George W. Bush, Conrad Burns, and Ron Wyden! Way to revolutionize AMER-I-CAN-SPAM.

Literal Total Eclipse of the Heart

RT: @notspam1: Give it time, but literal version of Total Eclipse of the Heart is great: http://tinyurl.com/nacjd8

UPDATE: A good follow-up is the literal version of "Anything for Love"...

"Please unsubscribe me..."

A mailing list at the university was recently created and added a large number of faculty, staff, and others to it automatically. An announcement went out to all of these subscribers (who didn't know the list was going to be created) giving information on the list (and why they were added) and details about subscribing/unsubscribing/etc. Of course, many of them did not want to be subscribed. Rather than following the clear instructions on how to unsubscribe, they started sending e-mails to the list.

(Some actually sent e-mails to the list ASKING TO BE SUBSCRIBED!!)

Here's a snapshot (from Google Mail, rendered with an ASCII art theme) of the hilarity that ensued... (where names have been obscured to protect the guilty... I mean... innocent)

Notice how some of those messages are threads that are 10 messages deep. Also notice that this isn't a pruned inbox. This is a snapshot of an inbox that has been destroyed by this mailing list.

For the front of my 209 final exam...

For the front of the ECE 209 (Circuits and Electronics Laboratory) final exam I'm giving this Tuesday...

"Don't Be Upset" by Jeffrey and Jack Lewis

Great lyrics and a fun little song...

i took my darling out to the aquarium
sea creatures stared at us and we stared back at them
my baby freaked when she peeked at that 8-legged blob with a beak
she was too scared to speak
i said don't be upset it's only an octopus
don't bother it and i'm sure it won't bother us
please don't be upset my darling, please don't get upset
my baby came riding to meet me one time
on the crowed last car of the downtown-bound 9
she was brave but she caved
when the train was delayed
it was just the last straw in her hard busy day
i said don't get upset 'cuz it's not a catastrophe
nothing will happen and soon you'll be back with me
please don't be upset my darling , please don't be upset
my gal's got a headhache, her ankle is hurting too
boots she bought gave her a rash & her winsdom tooth
is coming in and it's damp out and she's having cramps and she's so mad at me cuz i didn't shave
i said don't be upset i know you're feeling sensitive
i'll try to be kinder and be more attentive
please don't be upset my darling please don't get upset
darling i said, i'm gonna be 27 soon
i've only got rejection letters and a sense of impending doom
i think it's too late for me
all the comic companies hate me
and i try but it's always the same
i guess my art is just lame and it's strange but still somehow i'm
always not suiting their needs at this time
and she said ........don't be upset,
you know that you're wonderful
just keep on trying ...(actually what she really said was)
all you ever wanna talk about is your self and your comic books and your album and your tour
and everytime i see your friends they just ask me where you are again and it hurts
it makes me feel like dirt
i'm just gonna write where you are on my shirt
and i said don't be upset, don't be in a bad mood
let's just go to a show and hang out and feel good
come on please don't be upset my darling, please don't be upset, i'll do anything baby, just don't be upset

Haverin on LiveJournal

From xkcd/77:

Because it drives me nuts...

From xkcd/394:

On a serious note, "kB" is "kilobyte" and "kb" is "kilobit." An uppercase "K" is "Kelvin," and so it should never be paired with either "B" or "b". For most modern machines, a "B"yte is 8 "b"its, but there is NO GOOD REASON to assume this case. The meaning of "kilo" is context-dependent, though it's computationally convenient to use 1024 rather than the standard 1000 (because computers address things in base-2).

Journal Reviewer Review

A recent paper of mine was rejected from Journal of Theoretical Biology. For fun, lets compare and contrast and selection from the reviewer comments ("MS" = "manuscript"):

From Reviewer #1:

Overall I really liked the work presented in this MS - by generalising the traditional models of the ecological economics underpinning solitary foraging behaviour the authors offer a very interesting (& in retrospect) intuitively appealing justification for accepting that the concorde fallacy may not always be fallacious.

From Reviewer #2:

This result seems to be of significance in biology, psychology, economics, and business, and I think that the paper is deserving of publication in JTB. The paper is also very well written, and the mathematical presentation is clear and precise.

Those two were pretty nice, and suggest that I should resubmit the paper with a couple tiny revisions and I'll be off and running. Great! Wait... What's this?

From Reviewer #3:

I regret to say I have no idea what this paper is about. The mathematical lingo is completely unfamiliar to me (after about 50 years of teaching and research in maths)...(details omitted)...(I recently had a grad student who wrote in this vein. When I asked him to explain in ordinary math, he gave up.) I didn't read any further. My advice is reject.

HUH?!

Beware of Aronoff?

I walk by this "Caution: Floor Wet" sign every day. I think it's funny because it's in Dreese Labs, which is very far away from Aronoff Laboratory.

It's as if the ECE's are being warned about the EEOB people.

These are my alli pants

I know I'm not the first one to point this out...

Some background information: alli is the first FDA approved diet pill. It works by blocking the absorption of fat. From their webpage:

myalli.com - what are treatment effects?

You may feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Until you have a sense of any treatment effects, it's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work

I shit you not.

There are some other good ones too.

You may not usually get gassy, but it's a possibility when you take alli. The bathroom is really the best place to go when that happens

Yummy! Time to get thin.

They Call Me the Quantifier...

A colleague saw this and thought of me... I thought it was pretty funny. :)

Note: I feel there are exactly two layers to the humor in that comic.

Putting ass in public schools

This was taken from a "word list" posted in the public school that I give science help to as part of my fellowship.

It's really nice that the "ass" list is the one with the heart shape. Happy Valentine's Day!