Teddy "Not Top 4.904%" Bear

So I got the response for my NDSEG fellowship application in the mail today.

Dear NDSEG Fellowship Applicant,

Your NDSEG application was among the 3,670 applicaitons that were submitted for evaluation. Approximately 180 total Fellowships will be awarded this year. Each application was reviewed by a group of panelists who specialized in their discipline. This letter is to inform you that your application for the 2005-2006 NDSEG Fellowship competition has not been selected for the award. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions. You may apply again for the NDSEG Fellowship next year. I encourage you to continue with your educational goals and good luck in your future endeavors.

Sincerly,
Program Manager
NDSEG Fellowship
ASEE Projects Office

So apparently I'm not top 4.904% material. Oh, well.

This was an attractive fellowship too. A stipend of $2500+/month, plus tuition, plus minimal health insurance coverage at universities that offer that to grad students. That's a pretty significant increase over my current stipend, though my current stipend is definitely very reasonable. It would have just been nice to live a little more comfortably (or have enough money to put into an IRA so I could have a deduction large enough to offset not being able to deduct tuition like in previous years).

Now, notice that that letter says I can apply next year. That adds insult to injury. You see, I can't apply next year. From the NDSEG website:

[Applications must] have completed no more than the equivalent of one academic year of full-time graduate study as a part-time or full-time student

So you see, next year I'll be starting my second full year of graduate school, so NDSEG simply isn't an option. So this means that they send out one big form letter to every non-selected applicant (loser?) regardless of whether they were an undergrad applicant or a grad applicant.

So I've been grouped in with a bunch of clueless undergrad applicants.

They say that since I'm not studying acoustics or nanosciences and I'm a white male, I had a few cards stacked against me anyway (perhaps I should have stressed acoustic connections in my application materials?)...

Now, the reason this is so biting is because I regret not applying for more financial support before my first year. You see, I really only applied for a university fellowship. I ended up receiving the most distinguished university fellowship. These fellowships (the DDU fellowship, a 5 year fellowship that really only funds for 3 years but gaurantees a GRA or GTA for the 2 other years) rarely go to ECE's. Two people in the department received them. The other kid also received an NSF fellowship (which I did not apply for). There's speculation that I could have received the NSF fellowship as well. In fact, random professors have forwarded NSF applicants onto me for help because they assume I got the NSF fellowship. This is either because they've confused me (Pavlic) with the other DDU recipient who did get the NSF (Parker) or because it's reasonable to assume a DDU recipient would also be an NSF recipient...

So I applied to NSF this year (which is the last year you can apply for the NSF, for the same reasons given with NDSEG)... But I know that I was just way too lazy last year, and I really should have taken the time to apply last year...

But, oh well... I'll work through it. Everyone does, right?

I hate funding. It's such petty stuff.